tangled words (lotusk) wrote,
tangled words
lotusk

Peace of Mind 2/2

Title: Peace of Mind [2/2]
Pairing: Junmyeon/Jongin
Rating: NC-17
Genre: Fluff, romance, smut, college!au
Length: Oneshot (10,800w)
Summary: College!au fic where Joonmyun falls hopelessly for his best friend Jongdae's housemate Jongin, and has a penchant for overstaying his welcome as a result.


"Admit it, you almost died. That Tomyam soup was like liquid fire."

"It was ... a little bit spicy." Jongin tries to say with a straight face even though his overlong fringe is sticking to his forehead in dark, wet strands and the red cotton tee is clinging to him in places because the soup was so spicy it had made him break a sweat. To his disgust, Joonmyun's face hadn't even gotten flushed from the stinging heat of the soup and he'd managed to stay pale and dry and fresh through the entire ordeal.

"You're such a bad liar, Jongin," Joonmyun chuckles, briefly placing a hand on Jongin's back as they take a leisurely stroll back to their apartment building. But ripples of sensation continue to warm Jongin's skin long after Joonmyun's removed his palm. Jongin isn't naive; he's had relationships and he understands what sexual attraction feels like and he's not the type to lie to himself either. The thing is Kim Joonmyun is the only guy he's ever responded to physically and he's not sure how he feels about it or what he's going to do about it. But for now, he's content to drape his arm around Joonmyun's shoulder and he leaves it there for the rest of their journey home even though it's a sultry, summer night and they're just friends. If Joonmyun finds it awkward, he doesn't let on but he does seem a little more reserved than usual.

Naturally, they end up in Jongin's apartment. Joonmyun mumbles something about having work to do but Jongin manages to persuade him to come over because watching a movie on your own is "something that aging, balding, sexually frustrated men do." This makes Joonmyun laugh and he wavers and walks out of the lift with Jongin, and into his Jongdae-free apartment.

"I am so done with this." Jongin groans as he shuts the door and picks off the moist filaments of hair poking at his eyelids, "But God only knows when I'll find the time and energy to get a haircut." He grumbles as he grabs a fistful of fringe and holds it up and away from his forehead.

"I can trim it for you." Junmyeon offers as he gives Jongin's hair an appraising look.

"You can cut hair?!" Jongin asks in disbelief.

"I used to work summers at my cousin's barber shop. How do you think Jongdae keeps his hair short all the time? The guy's too much of a cheapskate to go for regular haircuts so he bullies his best friend into cutting his hair for him ... for free." Joonmyun says with ill-concealed disgust.

"Oh my God! I never knew," Jongin chuckles and his eyes are alive with mirth and delight and he's so beautiful when he laughs that Joonmyun has to look away.

"He usually comes to my apartment for haircuts because my scissors and things are there."

"Do you cut your own hair?"

"Well, I do my fringe in between haircuts."

"I never even knew Jongdae wasn't getting his hair cut by a hairdresser. You're pretty good."

"I wouldn't say I'm good but I probably won't damage things to a point where you need to wear a snapback every time you leave the apartment," Joonmyun jokes and then laughs as Jongin blanches. "I'm kidding! I promise I won't butcher your hair. I just need to go get my scissors and things."

"I can go over to your place if it's easier for you?"

"No! I mean ... It's okay, I won't be long. My hyung and his girlfriend are home and ... It's just easier to do it here." Joonmyun shrugs sheepishly.

"If you're sure. And Joonmyun? Thanks, man." As the door closes behind Joonmyun, it suddenly occurs to Jongin that he's all sweaty from dinner and Joonmyun's about to touch his hair and ... Shit, he really needs to take a shower because he doesn't want to gross Joonmyun out. Part of him protests that it shouldn't even matter; they're both men and it's not like Jongin's trying to pick him up because it's not like Jongin is into guys anyway. But the other part of him, the part that's been getting louder and louder in the past week, wants to know what it's like to feel the press of Kim Junmyeon's pretty coral pink lips beneath his own, and to have those small hands explore his neck and chest. And suddenly there's absolutely no question of Jongin not showering because he needs cold water for the boner that's pushing uncomfortably against the zipper of his white cotton drill shorts ...

***

Joonmyun leans against the elevator wall and covers his face with his palms. Why did he offer to cut Jongin's hair? What was he thinking? He pictures his fingers gently gripping strands of chestnut brown hair and brushing the other man's scalp and neck and he knows he's looking at at least twenty minutes of sustained contact. Already shaken from the walk home with Jongin, Joonmyun worries he'll lose control and mess everything up. When Jongin had put his arm around his shoulder after leaving the cafe, Joonmyun's arm had almost shot out and encircled his waist. He'd managed to stop himself just in time. Jongin's skin had been warm and sensuous against his - the most exquisite contact. After two and a half months of yearning, it had almost been too much. It had been the sweetest kind of torture because Joonmyun had welcomed Jongin's casual gesture with the knowledge that he couldn't ever touch him back in the same way. He didn't trust himself to.

It only takes him a few minutes to gather his steel scissors, cutting collar, comb, and spray bottle; but he's so distracted he almost forgets his glasses. Joonmyun thinks about calling Jongin and telling him he can't do it after all but in the end, all he wants is to be with Jongin. Mind made up, he leaves his apartment, body taut with anxiety and anticipation.

***

The doors to the balcony are wide open as they always are on summer nights, so there's a mild breeze wafting in that cools down the apartment and makes it balmy and welcoming. Jongin is effortlessly sexy in black board shorts and a loose, black sleeveless tank that leaves his tanned, leanly muscled arms exposed. He's obviously just had a shower as his hair hangs down his forehead, straight and wet. He looks amazing and with a sinking sensation, Joonmyun knows giving Jongin a haircut is going to be a real challenge. It's not the first time he's seen Jongin with wet hair - he's always been hyper aware of Jongin - but this is the first time Joonmyun will be touching it and his heart accelerates a beat or two in his nervousness. He puts on his reading glasses in a futile attempt to distract himself.

"I wanted to ask you about your glasses the other day. How come I never saw you in glasses before that time on campus?"

"I'm farsighted. I only need them for reading and for when I have to look at things up close like when I'm cutting hair or sewing on buttons. I can watch TV fine without them."

"You sew?" Jongin looks intrigued.

"I can do basic mending anyway. I've been living away from home for years. My hyung would tell me where to shove it if I asked him to help and I wasn't going to ask his girlfriend to help."

"And your ex-es?"

"Were guys who didn't know one end of a needle from the other. Can you sew?"

"Yeah, yeah I know enough to fix buttons and stuff. My ex-es were girls who couldn't sew." Jongin admitted with a grin and they both chuckled.

"But your glasses, Joonmyun ... I like them. I mean I like the way you look in them." Jongin says and it's not exactly awkward because Jongin is never awkward, and yet his light cinnamon skin looks a little flushed and Joonmyun wonders if perhaps ... Could Jongin be a little bicurious? But he's never shown any signs of being anything less than heterosexual and he tells himself to stop being fanciful ...

They're in the center of the living room where the light is better and Jongin is seated on a wooden stool, his shoulders covered by a charcoal gray rubber cutting collar. Joonmyun's fingers are carefully holding up sections of soft, fine hair and examining them, and he tries his best not to let his fingers graze against Jongin's scalp and neck but the odd touch is inescapable. The occasional contact doesn't seem to affect Jongin as he sits: unmoving and uncharacteristically silent. There's no sound but the metallic snip snip of the scissors as Joonmyun carefully measures and cuts Jongin's hair, cropped locks of it falling downward and littering the tiled floor around them. When he's trimming the sideburns, his fingers are a little shaky as they brush the tips of Jongin's ears and he has to concentrate extra hard to make sure everything's symmetrical. He's almost finished doing the final sideburn when his fingers skate across the shell of Jongin's ear and there's an audible gasp and it's not his. Joonmyun pretends he doesn't hear it as he manipulates the scissors expertly and completes the haircut. He puts the scissors down and he's about to step back and survey the haircut for symmetry when an arm snakes around his waist and drags him forward so he ends up standing between Jongin's thighs. Joonmyun's heartbeat begins to quicken erratically as Jongin grips his forearms and warm, fluttering sensations shudder across his skin.

"Jongin, what's going on?" Joonmyun asks, his voice laced with confusion.

Then, inexplicably, Jongin reaches for Joonmyun's glasses and slowly removes the frames.

"Jongin?"

"These glasses make things even harder for me. I can't resist you when you have them on."

"I don't understand." Joonmyun actually thinks he's beginning to understand but he isn't self confident enough to ask if Jongin is coming on to him.

And before he can say anything else, Jongin's stroking his face slowly, like he's memorizing the way Joonmyun's skin feels beneath the pads of his fingers.

"I've never touched a guy's face before, other than my own." There is a trace of wonder in Jongin's words as his fingers continue to explore the curves and edges of his face. Jongin's fingertips are warm, so warm and Joonmyun closes his eyes because the contact is just too exquisite to bear. "You've got more angular lines and edges ... And your skin isn't as fine or soft as a girl's. I've never touched anyone else's stubble before," Jongin's palm cradles his jaw gently and drags it across finely stubbled skin.

"It must be a little weird for you," Joonmyun's eyes are still closed and his voice sounds fragile and not like his own.

"No. It's just different. I like it ... I like you."

"Jongin, why? Why are you doing this?" His eyelids open reluctantly, like he's afraid of what he'll find in Jongin's eyes.

"I keep seeing your face. I can't seem to stop seeing it everywhere I go." There's a whish as Jongin removes the rubber collar from his shoulders and truncated strands of cut hair cascade to the ground.

"But it's just me."

"I think that's the point." Jongin says and he exhales shakily just before he leans forward and captures Joonmyun's lips in a tentative kiss. His movements are hesitant and uncertain like he's never done this before and isn't quite sure what to do next. So Joonmyun moves a little closer and kisses him more urgently, letting his hands roam over Jongin's bare collarbones and arms. He's ached to touch Jongin for months so it's almost surreal that those are his fingers on Jongin's shoulder, his fingers gripping Jongin's nape, his mouth moving passionately over Jongin's, and his tongue curling sensually around Jongin's. The other man is moaning as he responds to Joonmyun's caresses and he's already hard - his rigid cock pressing against Joonmyun's thigh. Abruptly, Jongin stands up and he's so much taller and everything's happening too fast ... They haven't even talked about things, but caution is the furthest thing from Joonmyun's mind as his right hand slides up Jongin's back, gliding across liquid smooth skin and over strong shoulder blades while his left hand explores the small of Jongin's back, fingers pressing against the warm skin inside the waistband of his shorts.

With a sharp intake of breath, Jongin drags Joonmyun to the coffee colored couch a few feet away and tumbles them both onto the fabric surface. Jongin lands first, on his back, while Joonmyun ends up sprawled across his chest. His eyes are burning pools of desire as Jongin pulls Joonmyun down and their lips meet in a kiss that is both tender and scorching. Their bodies slide against each other, creating a delicious kind of friction and the sensations only intensify when Joonmyun rolls his hips and their erections press against each other through two thin layers of clothing. There's a deep, sweet ache in Joonmyun's groin as he settles himself on Jongin's hips and Jongin's cock and thrusts against its hard length. He can feel a fraction of the heat through the whisper of fabric that separates them and he wants to die from the unbearable tightness. Every instinct urges him to slip his hand inside Jongin's shorts and take him in hand but a single, remaining sliver of reason stops him and reminds him that Jongin's never been with a man. He shouldn't rush him, so he just palms him through the fabric instead when they're not grinding against each other.

Jongin licks his neck and there's a slight sting as he marks Joonmyun where his neck meets his left shoulder. Joonmyun knows they should talk things over first, discuss where they stand with each other first before making out. His conscience tells him this but his hips continue to rock erotically into Jongin's as the other man kisses him and tongues his ear. Minutes pass before Joonmyun arches his back and they moan uninhibitedly, their bodies shuddering in bliss. Spent, Joonmyun's body sinks bonelessly onto Jongin's and he rests his head on the hard, still-clothed chest beneath his cheek. For a while they just try to catch their breaths and then Jongin wraps his arm around him and hugs him close, and flushed with afterglow, they ignore the wetness in their shorts and fall asleep in each other's arms.

***

It's almost 10 pm when Joonmyun wakes up, sticky and groggy, with the scent of Jongin's skin in his nostrils. His limbs are still languid from earlier and he spends a few minutes just luxuriating in Jongin. He doesn't want to think right now about how this intimacy would most likely ruin their friendship; he just wants to feel. And suddenly it's too much - he feels too much. If things don't work out and there's a high chance they won't because Jongin's never even been into guys, will he be able to cope with the heartbreak? Now he's started thinking, he moves right on to overthinking - he can't seem to stop himself. What if he gets even more deeply attached than he already is? What if Jongin tires of him? What if Jongin decides that he can't deal with being gay? There are so many negatives in this equation and all at once, Joonmyun feels like he can't breathe and he doesn't want to risk losing himself in a relationship that will probably end in pain. He's already fallen so deeply for Jongin that there can only be pain when things fall apart. Quietly, he extricates himself from Jongin's arms and the younger man shifts restlessly but doesn't wake. He's so beautiful in sleep, and this, this Joonmyun has never seen. He's never seen Jongin in slumber. Relaxed in sleep, Jongin's exotic face is more boyish, and his full lips form a subtle pout as his chest rises and falls in a steady rhythm. The sight leaves a pang in Joonmyun's chest that hurts him to the core. He wants so much to stay and take his chances and be with Jongin but his head overpowers his heart and propels his feet toward the door - taking him out of the apartment and out of Jongin's life.

***

Jongin wakes up twenty minutes later to empty arms and an empty apartment. He smiles as he recalls the way Joonmyun had looked and felt as their bodies had moved intimately together and the way he'd fit so securely in his arms. But where had he gone? After a few minutes, Jongin knocks on the bathroom door but the door isn't locked and there's no one inside. That's when he realizes Joonmyun's navy blue Vans sneakers are gone. It doesn't make sense and Jongin calls him and the phone rings and rings till it's routed to voice mail. He tries another two times with the same result and he finally sends him a text message:

Why did you leave? Call me please?

But Joonmyun doesn't call back. He doesn't call back for the next two weeks. Jongin rings him multiple times but the call either goes to voice mail or Joonmyun answers the phone briefly to say he's in the middle of something right now and he can't talk and the cycle repeats itself. He tries sending text messages to Joonmyun which the latter replies without actually answering any of his questions and this has Jongin worried.

Joonmyun, why aren't you picking up? We need to talk. Call me?
I just can't right now, Jongin. Sorry I just can't.

We're watching Pulp Fiction tonight. See you for dinner?
Can't make it. Jongdae's getting the pizza. Enjoy.

How are you? Can you come over to my place? We should talk.
Can't. I have a deadline.


And then finally, he resorts to simply worded pleas which go unanswered.

Please pick up.

Joonmyun, I miss you. Please answer.



Desperate and confused, Jongin even goes to his apartment a few times and knocks on his door but there's never any answer except for the one time Joonmyun's brother Joonhae had opened the door for him, only to inform Jongin that he wasn't at home. Meanwhile, every time Jongin glimpses his reflection in a mirror or a glass door or a puddle of rainwater, he sees his newly trimmed hair and thinks of Joonmyun. The older man has stayed away for more than two weeks and it's reached a point where Jongin has even begun asking Jongdae how he is and why he hasn't been around. Jongdae airily tells him that Joonmyun is fine - just busy with college and project deadlines.

When Jongin walks the corridors of the campus and the aisles of the library, his eyes constantly scan and search for Joonmyun's face but it's like that one time they crossed paths was an anomaly because they haven't bumped into each other at university since.

...

The bistro where Jongin works part-time has decent business on week nights but Saturdays always get really hectic, and tonight is no exception. Dressed in his tailored white button down shirt, black jeans and knee-length black waiter's apron which sits low on his lean hips, Jongin moves briskly and efficiently around the restaurant floor all night. After hours of balancing huge seafood and steak platters and decanting thirteen bottles of wine, Jongin's arms are tired and achey, and the arches of his feet are sore. At least the tips are good, he consoles himself as he unties the apron, unbuttons his uniform whites and changes into a fresh t-shirt.

It's only an eight minute walk back to the apartment but his mind inevitably wanders and locks on Joonmyun. He's always on the fringes of Jongin's consciousness, like a tear in his shirt that he's just recently noticed and which he's suddenly overwhelmingly aware of being there - a rip that just gets bigger and bigger, a rend he can't help poking at and worrying. Jongin knows he should give up because Joonmyun clearly doesn't want a relationship with him but he can't let go of something that had barely even started before the other man shut him out. He can't accept that he won't be able to hold him or touch him or talk to him again. And he knows Joonmyun feels something for him - he'd seen it in his eyes that night they'd been together. He'd felt it in the tender way Joonmyun's hands and lips had roamed over his body.

Jongin is soon in his apartment building and entering the lift. His finger reaches out to press the number 2 for his floor, but with a strange sense of detachment, Jongin watches his index finger depress the number 12 and the lift begins moving - taking him to an apartment he's only visited twice before. Joonmyun probably isn't even home. It's a Saturday night, after all. People go out on Saturday nights to have fun, don't they? Maybe go out for a movie or dinner or coffee? And it's almost 12.30. What is he even doing here?

Before he knows it, he's facing a similar door to the one that leads to his own apartment, except this one is painted kingfisher blue. Joonmyun had chosen the color himself and painted it 6 weeks ago. Jongin isn't sure why he even remembers this but he does. He remembers most things Joonmyun tells him. He realizes this now. And he hasn't seen Joonmyun for more than two weeks and he misses him - not in a casual I-miss-hanging-out-with-him kind of way. It's a bone deep craving he's never experienced before and can't come to grips with. Jongin is about to press the doorbell when he remembers, in a daze, that Joonmyun doesn't live alone. His older brother and his girlfriend probably won't be too impressed if the doorbell echoes loudly through the apartment at this time of night. So he takes his phone out and calls, and waits and hopes Joonmyun will answer for a change.

"Jongin, it's late," Joonmyun says and Jongin hasn't heard his voice in five days and there's an ache deep in his chest at finally hearing it again.

"I'm outside. Please, Joonmyun, I need to see you." Jongin doesn't even care anymore about the desperation in his voice.

"Jongin, I don't want to see you. I can't ... I'm finally starting to get over this. I want to forget what happened that night." His voice is stubborn but Jongin senses a thread of longing.

"But don't you see? I don't want you to get over this. I don't want to forget; I can't forget what happened and I don't want to and please just come out, Joonmyun. Just this once, please. I haven't seen you in more than two weeks. I need to see you."

"Two minutes. I'll give you two minutes." Joonmyun sounds determined but Jongin can be determined too and he's not giving up without a fight.

The door opens and Jongin feels the fullness in his chest swell as he sees the heart shaped face he's not laid eyes on in sixteen days. Joonmyun looks wan and tired and his hair looks like he's been lying in bed and he's hastily finger combed it on the way to the front door. He's wearing faded gray gym shorts and an old plain white tee. He looks thin and exhausted - but he doesn't look like he's been woken up from sleep. The ache in Jongin's chest intensifies and he doesn't say anything - he just lets out a sigh which is half worry, half relief and pulls Joonmyun into his arms. There's some resistance as Joonmyun struggles to break out of the embrace but Jongin won't let go and after a few seconds, Joonmyun sighs, and his thin body relaxes. And the ache in Jongin's chest recedes a little as Joonmyun's arms wrap around his much taller, much broader body and hugs him back.

"I missed you so much." Jongin says simply as he buries his face in the bony curve of Joonmyun's shoulder.

"But you're not even into guys." Joonmyun points out a shade bitterly.

"Just you, apparently." Jongin hand curls around Joonmyun's nape and there's nothing platonic about the gesture.

"I don't want to be just an experiment, Jongin."

"You're not. I've liked you as a friend for almost three months and I've liked you as more than a friend for almost a month of that time and I don't think that's changing any time soon. I've never been attracted to any guy other than you so this isn't just an experiment,"

"I'm not sure I can do this, Jongin."

"I'm not sure I can take it if you don't even try," Jongin's looking at him now, Joonmyun's face cradled between his palms. "Give us a try, Joonmyun, please?" Jongin pleads just before his lips cover coral pink lips in the tenderest of kisses, "A chance, that's all I ask." And he's kissing Joonmyun again, his tongue exploring the gentle slopes and dips of his mouth before Joonmyun moans softly and his lips part, letting Jongin in. As their tongues tangle gently and their breaths mingle, Joonmyun's hands reach beneath Jongin's shirt and travel across his bare back and shoulders and he pushes his body closer and they just fit, everything fits so perfectly. Fingers stroke the edges of his jawline and traverse his scalp as their kiss deepens and Jongin's skin comes alive with sensation. But most of all, as he gives himself up to the kiss, Jongin can feel his heart mending and healing and everything feels all right because Joonmyun is in his arms and touching him. Everything is perfect.

"Come home with me," Jongin drags his lips away from the sweet curve of Joonmyun's neck to say.

"But Jongdae?"

"Is spending the night at his girlfriend's place. Her roommate is gone for the weekend so he won't be back tonight. Come home with me," Jongin asks again just before he dusts kisses along the smooth surface of Joonmyun's slim neck.

Joonmyun doesn't say anything but he puts on some flip flops, locks the kingfisher blue door and lets Jongin take his hand and tow him to the elevator. Once the doors seal shut, Jongin pulls Joonmyun up close against his chest and says softly, "I missed you." Then he kisses him and holds him close and Joonmyun is quiet as he sighs and lays his cheek on the broad expanse of Jongin's chest.

***

"I'm gonna take a shower. I worked a six hour shift and I smell like a restaurant."

"Maybe just a little." Joonmyun laughs as he sits down on the bed. He feels a little awkward all of a sudden.

"You've lost weight. Have you been eating and sleeping enough?" Jongin sits down beside him instead of heading for the bathroom.

"My appetite hasn't been too good I guess and I've been sleeping badly." Joonmyun admits reluctantly.

"If I contributed ... I'm sorry, Joonmyun." Jongin's palm is on his pale cheek. "I'm taking you for an all-you-can-eat lunch and dinner tomorrow so you can start putting some weight back on."

"You're wasting your money! I can't eat that much."

"I don't care. I want you to eat. You're too thin, I'm worried."

"I'll be ok. Just go shower."

"You should lie down and rest. I know it's late." Jongin looks and sounds concerned as he gives him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Just go," Joonmyun says with a tired half-smile.

"You'll still be here when I get back? I won't come back to find you gone?"

"I'll be here, Jongin." Joonmyun lays down on the double bed, hugging the pillow beneath him. It smells citrusy and male and Jongin. Fingers of cool air caress his legs just before thin fabric settles on his body.

"I won't be long, Joonmyun. Rest ..." Jongin tucks the light blanket around Joonmyun, and kisses his forehead before he leaves the room.

A small part of Joonmyun still doesn't think he should have given in to the insistent whispers of his heart and followed Jongin home. And he still believes there's a chance he'll be badly scarred in the long run, but he really doesn't care anymore because being apart from Jongin hurts too and he doesn't want to live with enforced emptiness anymore. It's a wound that won't heal anyway so he's done with it. And if he's honest with himself, the more he thinks about it, maybe Jongin's not such a bad bet after all ...

***

"Your fringe is getting long." Joonmyun's fingers stroke the dark chestnut strands - his fingertips making tiny knots of pleasure on Jongin's forehead.

"You'll have to cut it for me again," Jongin teases as his fingertips trace the contours of the pale pink lips he's wanted to touch since the night Joonmyun told him he was gay. They're so soft and pretty and Jongin can't resist kissing them.

"I'm beginning to think you only wanna date me for the free haircuts." Joonmyun says sarcastically and Jongin's so glad to see pieces of the old Joonmyun surfacing again.

"Think of all the pizza we could buy with the money I save on haircuts!" Jongin laughs and Joonmyun punches his arm in mock outrage. Then Jongin's face becomes serious all of a sudden as he says, "You know I can't be without you, right? That's why I've been trying to see you for the past two weeks. I just ... I need you in my life, Joonmyun. Just you. Does that make sense? Are you okay with that?"

"How can I not be?" Joonmyun says and buries his face in Jongin's chest - suddenly self-conscious.

"So you won't disappear on me again?"

"No, I won't. What I did was wrong and really unfair to you but I was really scared of getting hurt, you know?"

"You like me too, then?" Jongin asks hesitantly because Joonmyun hasn't actually said anything directly.

"I must have hidden my feelings better than I thought." He runs his fingers along the ridges of Jongin's collarbones. "I've liked you pretty much since you moved in. Wasn't it obvious?"

"I wasn't looking out for it before you told me you were gay. And then after you told me you kept avoiding me."

"Now you know." Joonmyun says before he initiates a lingering kiss that begins with the mouth and moves to the neck and collarbones and leads to Jongin's t-shirt coming off. His tanned skin is warm and smells of lemons and his still damp hair smells fresh and so good. Joonmyun expels a shaky breath as Jongin pulls his white tee over his head and then they're skin to skin and Jongin's never been so turned on. It's not what he's used to but he doesn't feel any lack as his hands explore the flat, hard planes of Joonmyun's chest and abs, and his tongue flicks the other man's rosy pink nipples. His hand moves down to explore the hard length of Joonmyun's erection and Jongin revels in his gasps of pleasure as he eases down the waistband of his shorts. Slowly, uncertainly, Jongin fists his cock and pulls. As Joonmyun moans, he increases his pace and tugs harder. He's so focused on his task he doesn't even realize what Joonmyun's hand is doing until the pleasure hits him at the subtle pressure of Joonmyun's strong fingers wrapped around his cock. In a matter of seconds, they're both completely naked and just feeling the silken heat of Joonmyun's skin against his own is almost enough to make Jongin come. Joonmyun can't stop staring as Jongin's kiss-swollen lips form an "oh" of ecstasy and he makes a sound which is half moan, half sigh before plunging his eager tongue into Jongin's mouth. They kiss ardently as they pleasure each other with their hands and when they finally come minutes later, it's within seconds of each other.

"Don't leave this time, Joonmyun. I don't want to wake up and find you gone." Jongin says quietly and Joonmyun nods and reassures him that he'll stay if he wants him to. Satisfied with his answer, Jongin grabs some tissues and cleans them up. Then he gathers Joonmyun in his arms and covers them with his blanket.

"Stay with me always," Jongin whispers as he moulds his chest to Joonmyun's back.

"Always." Joonmyun says softly. And as Jongin's warmth surrounds him and makes him feel safe, Joonmyun's heart and mind are at peace for the first time in three months.


Epilogue

The sun is already high in the sky when Joonmyun wakes up the following morning. Intense summer sunlight is forcing its way through the gaps in between the taupe Venetian blinds and Joonmyun squints at the harshness of the light. Jongin is still asleep, but his arms continue to hold Joonmyun securely. He's loathe to leave all that security, but he really needs to use the toilet so he carefully untangles himself from Jongin and manages to not wake him. Joonmyun rummages through the pile of clothing on the floor before locating, then pulling on his plaid boxers. He doesn't bother with a shirt because he fully intends to climb back into bed and sleep away the rest of the lazy Sunday. Bleary eyed, he wanders out of Jongin's room and bumps into a wide-eyed and clearly bewildered Jongdae.

"Whoa, dude! Why are you coming out of Jongin's room in just your boxers - NO! WAIT! ON SECOND THOUGHT DON'T ANSWER THAT BECAUSE I'M NOT READY FOR THE TRUTH! I do not need to know that my best friend and my roomie just did the nasty! Just no, dude."

"God, Dae, will you stop shouting? I just wanna take a leak." Joonmyun groans and stumbles to the toilet.

"Jongin! You and Joonmyun? What the hell?! Why didn't anyone tell me anything? How long has this been going on? You guys, what the hell?" Jongdae hammers on the bedroom door, bellowing.

"Since yesterday. Stop yelling for fuck's sake. I'm going back to bed." Joonmyun says calmly as he walks past him and enters Jongin's room.

"But Jongin isn't gay!" Jongdae is clearly perplexed.

"I AM! Now go away, Dae!" A sleepy voice shouts from behind Jongin's door.

"Dammit, I'm never going to have any peace now with my best friend and roomie fucking like rabbits next door. YOU GUYS SUCK, MAN!" Jongdae bellows one last time, but his face is etched in a grin because he's secretly happy they've hooked up. But he'll be damned if he ever admits that to either of them. He stares at the door and shakes his head. Rabbits. They're probably going at it like rabbits ...


Part 1
Tags: college!au, exo, fluff, jongdae, jongin, kai, kaiho, nc-17, romance, suho, sukai
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